Yesterday, I watched part of the ongoing, UN sponsored Khmer Rouge Tribunal. Basically, just before the final surrender of the KR in 1998, Cambodia asked the UN to help it find a way to try high ranking KR officials. After years of debate about what the court should look like, the tribunal opened in 2007. Its unique in that its actually taking place in Cambodia and that its a joint project between Cambodia and the UN. There are Cambodian and foreign judges, defenders, and prosecutors. Its purpose is to try the highest ranking members of the KR. Pol Pot, the leader, died in 1998, so he can't be prosecuted. Its completely unreasonable to try regular soldiers or supporters because that is a lot of people who have re-entered Cambodian society as productive citizens. (Also, many of these people only joined the KR to protect the lives of their own families) The goal of the tribunal is to try to bring about justice for the victims' families and bring some closure for the whole nation. So far 5 people have been accused before the tribunal. Only 1 trial has been completed, in which the man in charge of the main torture center was found guilty and sentenced to 30 years in prison (life is prison is the worst sentence possible because the death penalty in unconstitutional in Cambodia- one area where they have us beat- plus all the people are quite old already anyway). We went to see part of this man's appeal. Although he confessed during the trial and expressed remorse, he still pleaded not guilty. Now he is appealing saying that he was not a high ranking official and was just following orders to avoid the killing of his own family and therefore does not fall under the mandate of the court.
What we saw was quite boring, court mumbo jumbo, but the whole idea of the trials is interesting. They feel like a strange imposition of Western ways on Cambodia. In the west, we say remember bad things that happen so they don't happen again. In Cambodia, some agree with this but many would say don't talk about bad things or else they will happen again. But there has to be some kind of justice, some kind of trial, doesn't there?
Also, what is justice in this case anyway? The killing fields were 30 years ago. The people being prosecuted are in their 70s and 80s and no one except for the first man has shown any remorse at all. In my opinion, the bulk of Cambodians aren't paying too close of attention to the trials anyway. Sitting in that courtroom, it didn't feel like justice in action. It felt like mankind's attempt to maintain an equilibrium in the world. You do bad things, bad things happen to you. We have to believe that's true or else we'd go crazy. So maybe we need to create that sense of control, even if its shallow- simply because life has to go on. I don't know. They are very big questions with no answers but very interesting to think about.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Thailand!
Last week, I spent 4 days or so in Bangkok, Thailand. One other SALTer in Cambodia, LynAnne, and I met up with a SALTer in Laos, Whitney. This was a crazy last minute planned trip, totally southeast asia style, and we went in with our only expectation being 'Starbucks please.' And like all last minute planned things in SE Asia, it worked out pretty dang well. Here are the high lights:
Bangkok was great, a massive, cosmopolitan megopolis. But, I'm glad to be back in Phnom Penh, my home away from home. Its amazing how much speaking the language even a little makes life easier. I'm suddenly more grateful for Phnom Penh's negotiable traffic, friendly people, more laid back pace. This year may be ruining my ability to be just a tourist. But, its good to be reminded how much I love this place- and I have less than 4 months to go! Crazy
- Street food- very different than the stuff you see in Cambodia. I loved the custard cups, fresh squeezed orange juice, burrito (I know, I don't think it was actually Thai lol), and grilled chicken.
- Great conversations with LynAnne and Whitney comparing experiences, joys and frustrations. It felt like our own mini mid year retreat. I feel very refreshed to return to my life in Cambodia for the remaining 4 ish months.
- Grand Palace- one word: Sparkly
- Reclining Buddha- 40 meters of giant, golden, Buddha-ness. The most impressive Buddha I've seen this year- and I've seen quite a lot
- The joy of being in malls again. Phnom Penh has two, but the ones in Bangkok are nicer than any I've ever been to in the States. Think Gucci, Versace, Burberry- nothing we could afford in there!
- Seeing Andy and Lana, our regional MCC reps, and their new arrival, Aaron. They had been in town for the birth and headed back to Cambodia a day before us. So, we were officially the first to see him on the MCC team. : ) Very cute.
- Seeing a movie in a movie theater- even if it was a depressing European movie
- Visiting a floating market- a market on two sides of a river, with some people selling food right off their boats.
- A boat trip on the Mekong at night to see fireflies- 1000s of them
- And of course, Starbucks- twice. Yum.
Bangkok was great, a massive, cosmopolitan megopolis. But, I'm glad to be back in Phnom Penh, my home away from home. Its amazing how much speaking the language even a little makes life easier. I'm suddenly more grateful for Phnom Penh's negotiable traffic, friendly people, more laid back pace. This year may be ruining my ability to be just a tourist. But, its good to be reminded how much I love this place- and I have less than 4 months to go! Crazy
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
The Host Family Experience
Looking back, I've mentioned and praised my host family on this blog numerous times. I've told you their names, my initial fears, and how much I love them now. I thought I would use this post to expand a little bit on what it means to live with a host family. The 60 SALTers spread out around the world are having a wide variety of experiences. Some are living with other foreigners for securities sake, some are living with ethnic minorities, some have host parents, some have only host siblings like me, some are living with fellow Christians and some are not, and its inevitable that some aren't in love with their host family experience. Host families seem to be one of the main things that cause new SALTers worry. Will I be able to communicate? Will they like me? Will I be uncomfortable all the time?
My host family experience has been down right fantastic. Sure, I have moments of uncomfortable-ness and awkwardness, but the relationships I have with my 3 host sisters have real depth and are truly rewarding. They also serve as the best gatekeepers into Cambodian culture and relationships with other Cambodians. I get to do and see so many things with them that I never could otherwise. I've been completely convinced that every overseas worker should at least do a home stay because the experience is vital. So here's a few facts I've learned about life with host families:
1) Expect to be nervous and awkward at first. Expect 6 weeks of it being exhausting to be at home, of it not feeling like home.
2)Expect to be at work on a Friday on week 7 or 8 and suddenly realize that you actually want to go home, that home sounds relaxing- BREAKTHROUGH
3) Expect to have all the out of town relatives come into town just to meet you
4) Even though its hard at the beginning, force yourself to hang out with your family- those hours will pay off later when you don't need to force yourself anymore
5) Give yourself space- its okay to leave the house on a saturday if you're starting to get restless or homesick
6) Enjoy unexpected things in common- for me a love of going dancing
7) Enjoy the fact that relationships can happen even when communication is limited by a language barrier
8) Savor the moments you know you are a part of the family- for me when your sister says 'you love all the things we love' and 'it would have been more fun if you were there' and being trusted with the history of the family, good and bad.
9) Realize how we are all the same- like when my sister says 'hurry up Nicole, American Idol is on' or when we all pray together
10) Enjoy how we are all different- like when you can't quite understand why no one plans anything in advance ever, but you just kind of go with it all the time and learn to love the unexpected fun things that happen
I'm so grateful my host family experience has been positive. This would have been such a different year if I hadn't felt so loved and wanted in my temporary home.
The next new experience I will share them- going to their home province for Khmer New Year in mid-April : )
My host family experience has been down right fantastic. Sure, I have moments of uncomfortable-ness and awkwardness, but the relationships I have with my 3 host sisters have real depth and are truly rewarding. They also serve as the best gatekeepers into Cambodian culture and relationships with other Cambodians. I get to do and see so many things with them that I never could otherwise. I've been completely convinced that every overseas worker should at least do a home stay because the experience is vital. So here's a few facts I've learned about life with host families:
1) Expect to be nervous and awkward at first. Expect 6 weeks of it being exhausting to be at home, of it not feeling like home.
2)Expect to be at work on a Friday on week 7 or 8 and suddenly realize that you actually want to go home, that home sounds relaxing- BREAKTHROUGH
3) Expect to have all the out of town relatives come into town just to meet you
4) Even though its hard at the beginning, force yourself to hang out with your family- those hours will pay off later when you don't need to force yourself anymore
5) Give yourself space- its okay to leave the house on a saturday if you're starting to get restless or homesick
6) Enjoy unexpected things in common- for me a love of going dancing
7) Enjoy the fact that relationships can happen even when communication is limited by a language barrier
8) Savor the moments you know you are a part of the family- for me when your sister says 'you love all the things we love' and 'it would have been more fun if you were there' and being trusted with the history of the family, good and bad.
9) Realize how we are all the same- like when my sister says 'hurry up Nicole, American Idol is on' or when we all pray together
10) Enjoy how we are all different- like when you can't quite understand why no one plans anything in advance ever, but you just kind of go with it all the time and learn to love the unexpected fun things that happen
I'm so grateful my host family experience has been positive. This would have been such a different year if I hadn't felt so loved and wanted in my temporary home.
The next new experience I will share them- going to their home province for Khmer New Year in mid-April : )
Thursday, March 10, 2011
2 nights in Battambang
Battambang, Battambang, Battambang - roles off the tongue doesn't it?
Battambang is the provincial capital of Battambang province in northwest Cambodia close to the Thai border. My fellow MCCer, Grace, and I decided to spend two nights there because we were already headed in that direction for a MCC staff retreat last weekend. The retreat was in Siem Riep and was good but no new interesting stories since it was my fourth trip there. (except for maybe a beautiful, handmade silk scarf for 20 bucks)
So last Monday, Grace and I hopped a bus to Battambang, checked into an $8 a night guesthouse, and had good khmer food and delicious smoothies (or fruit shakes as they are known here) for dinner. Battambang is the third largest city in Cambodia, maybe about 100,000 people, but I would still categorize it as a sleepy little town. We quickly realized that there were more foreigners in Battambang than we expected- but they were all hardcore backpackers. Battambang is a little off the beaten trail for regular tourists. Along with this realization, we acknowledged that we are in fact, not cool enough, or dirty enough, to be backpackers. But we can speak some Khmer, which ups our cool factor by like 10. So, we composed this haiku in honor of the Battambang backpackers:
Battambang is the provincial capital of Battambang province in northwest Cambodia close to the Thai border. My fellow MCCer, Grace, and I decided to spend two nights there because we were already headed in that direction for a MCC staff retreat last weekend. The retreat was in Siem Riep and was good but no new interesting stories since it was my fourth trip there. (except for maybe a beautiful, handmade silk scarf for 20 bucks)
So last Monday, Grace and I hopped a bus to Battambang, checked into an $8 a night guesthouse, and had good khmer food and delicious smoothies (or fruit shakes as they are known here) for dinner. Battambang is the third largest city in Cambodia, maybe about 100,000 people, but I would still categorize it as a sleepy little town. We quickly realized that there were more foreigners in Battambang than we expected- but they were all hardcore backpackers. Battambang is a little off the beaten trail for regular tourists. Along with this realization, we acknowledged that we are in fact, not cool enough, or dirty enough, to be backpackers. But we can speak some Khmer, which ups our cool factor by like 10. So, we composed this haiku in honor of the Battambang backpackers:
Hardcore backpackers
always scuzzy, always cheap
is this really fun?
always scuzzy, always cheap
is this really fun?
We spent our one full day in Battambang on a countryside tour with Mr. Tin Tin, a guide recommended by another MCCer. Tin Tin is a french children's book character that you see around Cambodia on T-shirts. (Which ofcourse Mr. Tin Tin was wearing to complete his look) First stop, the bamboo train. There's a rail line from Phnom Penh, through Battambang, to the Thai border made by the French in the 1930s. However, a lot of it is damaged now, so the line isn't in use. This situation gave birth to bamboo trains- carts made out of bamboo on train wheels that can be removed the tracks simply by lifting them- ie a cheap mode of transportation and a tourist attraction simultaneously. So after paying 5 bucks, we hopped on the bamboo train for a quick jaunt to the next station. It feels something like flying and something like you are about to derail at any moment. So fun. On our return trip however, the heavens opened up and it poured. I mean poured. There is no roof in a flat cart. Now, rainy season in Cambodia is from July-ish to November. It is not suppose to rain at all for another 4 months! So we were surprised, and soaked, and laughing hysterically. Very memorable.
The rest of the morning was spent touring through villages. We saw people making rice noodles, rice paper, fish paste, and sticky rice desserts. (umm, you can do a lot of stuff with rice) We saw a pre-French Buddhist temple (a wat) that was used as a prison under the Khmer Rouge and is now a site of mass graves. (the Khmer Rouge attempted to stop all religious practice in Cambodia and many wats were desecrated) Also, while we were driving we passed a group of boys on bikes. They all called out hello to us- the English word every Cambodian learns at birth. But, one boy yells out "hello! you won the world cup!" Now, Grace just happened to be wearing a World Cup T-shirt so we just cracked up. Was this the only English he knew or did he see the shirt? Who knows! Then, we had lunch at a very not-touristy restaurant in our own little hut overlooking the river.
In the afternoon we headed to Wat Banan- a temple dating back about 1000 years. Cambodia has more ancient temples than any other country. We climbed 380 steps to get to the top of the 'mountain' where the temple was. I say 'mountain' because Cambodia is very, very flat and any hill qualifies as a mountain here. In fact, Phnom, as in Phnom Penh, means mountain. If you know me at all , you know it was a feat for me to make it up and down those stairs without giving into vertigo. Grace was very patient with my progress! The temple was lovely and the view was nice.
We headed back to PP on an early bus the next morning. All in all, a very wonderful trip.
Oh yes, one last haiku written by Grace and I on the first day of our trip:
The rest of the morning was spent touring through villages. We saw people making rice noodles, rice paper, fish paste, and sticky rice desserts. (umm, you can do a lot of stuff with rice) We saw a pre-French Buddhist temple (a wat) that was used as a prison under the Khmer Rouge and is now a site of mass graves. (the Khmer Rouge attempted to stop all religious practice in Cambodia and many wats were desecrated) Also, while we were driving we passed a group of boys on bikes. They all called out hello to us- the English word every Cambodian learns at birth. But, one boy yells out "hello! you won the world cup!" Now, Grace just happened to be wearing a World Cup T-shirt so we just cracked up. Was this the only English he knew or did he see the shirt? Who knows! Then, we had lunch at a very not-touristy restaurant in our own little hut overlooking the river.
In the afternoon we headed to Wat Banan- a temple dating back about 1000 years. Cambodia has more ancient temples than any other country. We climbed 380 steps to get to the top of the 'mountain' where the temple was. I say 'mountain' because Cambodia is very, very flat and any hill qualifies as a mountain here. In fact, Phnom, as in Phnom Penh, means mountain. If you know me at all , you know it was a feat for me to make it up and down those stairs without giving into vertigo. Grace was very patient with my progress! The temple was lovely and the view was nice.
We headed back to PP on an early bus the next morning. All in all, a very wonderful trip.
Oh yes, one last haiku written by Grace and I on the first day of our trip:
Battambang haiku
we want to see bamboo trains
tin tin tin tin TIN
we want to see bamboo trains
tin tin tin tin TIN
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Idealism vs. Cynicism
A professor once warned me that after college, if you don't stay in touch with other like minded people, your idealism and goals to change the world will fade away. I'm sure this true, we were made to thrive in community. For me, the idealism vs. cynicism question is turning out to be a huge conundrum in this first year of "real life" after college. Since I came to Cambodia, I've probably spent more time following world news than ever before. I have the time and I do feel more plugged into what's going on in the rest of the world outside of my American bubble. And the news has been both inspiring and depressing with headlines about-
Other things make me cynical- European nations tightening their immigration laws and unable to hide the racism behind this change. Cambodia and Thailand clashing over an ancient temple whose ownership is contested because of how the French drew the border lines while they were in power here. Violence overtaking Libya. The constant spend more and increase the debt or make cuts that hurt the poor battle in the US.
So I've already discovered that being an idealist is not the easiest task is this world. But here's why I don't want to give up: I have always believed we live in a fallen, broken world where crappy things happen. I have known that people hurt each other- globally and inter-personally. But, I have also seen how great people and life can be when we cast off our selfishness and cynicism and just take the risk of holding onto hope. One person's actions can't change a corrupt government or feed all the hungry and make national debt disappear-- but one person can love and encourage his or her circle of influence. One person can make decisions about resource consumption and how they live out of deep convictions. One person can choose to reach across the lines that divide us all- race, nationality, culture, class, language, power- and love the best they can through all the messiness of real relationships. Its small, but its something. I haven't perfected any of these things, but I'll spend my life figuring out how to do them.
Some days, I don't want to read the news because its just depressing. But, I still can't give up my idealism because it makes my life better and it has the chance at making others' lives better too. I'm part of a generation that is mostly sick of the overconsumption of our parents, that sees the damage the me, me, me, screw the environment, screw the poor attitude caused. So, I don't think anyone- not our elders or the newspaper- has the right to dampen our enthusiasm to live a life that means something. We may succeed in some ways, and we will fail in others, but I think we deserve the chance to try something new.
Is that enough cheesy blog post for today? I think so. Having a blog is like giving me a soap box.
(P.S. I don't know if the whole ice cream from breast milk thing goes in the encouraging or depressing news section)
- The mostly peaceful overthrow of dictators in Egypt and Tunisia and widespread unrest against authoritarian governments throughout the Middle East and North Africa
- A US government that might shut down because no one can agree on a budget
- Natural disasters in Australia, New Zealand, Indonesia. . .
- Protesting in Wisconsin about labor rights
- Border clashes between Cambodia and Thailand with colonial roots
- Backlash against immigrants in Europe
Other things make me cynical- European nations tightening their immigration laws and unable to hide the racism behind this change. Cambodia and Thailand clashing over an ancient temple whose ownership is contested because of how the French drew the border lines while they were in power here. Violence overtaking Libya. The constant spend more and increase the debt or make cuts that hurt the poor battle in the US.
So I've already discovered that being an idealist is not the easiest task is this world. But here's why I don't want to give up: I have always believed we live in a fallen, broken world where crappy things happen. I have known that people hurt each other- globally and inter-personally. But, I have also seen how great people and life can be when we cast off our selfishness and cynicism and just take the risk of holding onto hope. One person's actions can't change a corrupt government or feed all the hungry and make national debt disappear-- but one person can love and encourage his or her circle of influence. One person can make decisions about resource consumption and how they live out of deep convictions. One person can choose to reach across the lines that divide us all- race, nationality, culture, class, language, power- and love the best they can through all the messiness of real relationships. Its small, but its something. I haven't perfected any of these things, but I'll spend my life figuring out how to do them.
Some days, I don't want to read the news because its just depressing. But, I still can't give up my idealism because it makes my life better and it has the chance at making others' lives better too. I'm part of a generation that is mostly sick of the overconsumption of our parents, that sees the damage the me, me, me, screw the environment, screw the poor attitude caused. So, I don't think anyone- not our elders or the newspaper- has the right to dampen our enthusiasm to live a life that means something. We may succeed in some ways, and we will fail in others, but I think we deserve the chance to try something new.
Is that enough cheesy blog post for today? I think so. Having a blog is like giving me a soap box.
(P.S. I don't know if the whole ice cream from breast milk thing goes in the encouraging or depressing news section)
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